overload.

i think i'm heading for information overload. the things i have to know. the things i wish i did not have to know, yet can't help but take in because they're all spelled out for me to know. the words i need to remember and the words i'd rather forget. the answers to questions i know i'd be asked, the answers to questions i didn't know i'd be asked. the anticipations. the surprises. the facts. the details. what i have to deal with. what i wish i didn't have to deal with.

it's only the second day of the week and i sometimes feel i've been served more than i can chew. and while i wish i could mince words, chop thoughts, and grill, baste and saute people, i can't because i've been feeling an inexplicable stillness and silence within. there's no rollercoaster of emotions, no mishmash of nerves and no jumbled entrails and feelings. i guess it only means there's still nothing to worry about. yet.

or it must be the cold. it's been rainy and gloomy and chilly these past days, i must have been numbed. there is nothing else i want than to curl up in bed and snuggle under the thick, warm covers. and overload on sleep and forget about everything else for a while - thoughts, people, events, time, days.

if only i wasn't so overloaded on caffeine.